I actually thought i wouldn't survive this whole week of exams. Thought i would rather do something else than face the seemingly long week of exams. No breaks in within at all. Worried that my over exhaustion will have an impact on my exams.
During the holidays, i was desperately hoping that time will pass slowly before the school reopens. Also, i have been wondering why is it that many jc students commited suicide. Yeah, probably i kinda understand how it feels just a week ago. Even though they are very smart with so many s-papers, wat i did feel the past week was just a small proportion of how much their stress. But still it is already enough to put me off. I don't think i will ever think of ending my life in such a way, probably just a slight notion about it.
I watched some tv program during the holidays and it featured this guy who had serious insomia. In the end, he didn't sleep for 17 years!!! Wow...haha...poor thing actually. He tried sleeping pills but it didn't work. So he had to do something to create illusion that he is sleeping. hmm, i think lack of sleep for such a long time is so extreme. Hmmm, i would just want one year of having insomia. This year will do. I seriously need a lot of hours to prepare for my A levels.
I have already went through more than half of the papers that i need to do. The worst is considered over--> Geography. Last paper is econs- hmm, quite manageable compared to geography. Yeah, at least survive. Gp - was alright, at least i manage to finish everything. Having quite a lot of things to write. hope can at least pass. i realised there are some problems in my essay. oh no...no idea... Maths- have actually mixed feelings. hope no careless mistakes...hope can passs or even better. forgot how to do some questions even though i did it before in the past. Ahh, i should have persevered on reading through the tutorials. Hate it.... Geography- initially i was quite alright at the start. able to look through the questions and have my own selection as quickly as possible. then i did a time mistake as in i forgot that drq requires 15 mins, i allocated half an hour for 1 drq. then luckily i realised it, if not i won't be able to finish most part of the papers..I am not sure whether I have written enough content for each question. When I was on to the 3rd drq, I started to feel the struggle within my heart. I always have this when I am doing geography paper.
I got this feeling that I won’t be able to make it through and might as well give it up. I kept on going against my feelings and try to break out of it. It certainly took lots of energy to do it. Finally, I started to hasten my speed. My hand is getting really tired. I think I really improved on my geography paper. In the past, whenever I see essay questions, my mind will just go blank and will have trouble writing an acceptable length of answer. Aha, this time I actually kept on writing. The flow of thought just keeps on going except that certain people in the examination hall kept on distracting me. The sudden cough just gave me a fright. The constant walking up and down the aisle is really distracting. Gosh, without all these distractions, I think I would have completed the whole paper faster. I actually left out some stuff to write- haven’t complete the whole paper. Sigh, I know how to do but I dun have time. Sigh. But anyway, I feel good when I was doing the paper. Haha. Hmm, it wasn’t so bad after all. Oh ya, hydrology question was taken from the A-level questions. Yeah, during the holidays while I was reading hydrology notes, I was looking at A level questions at the same time to think of the essay outlines in my mind and I kept on looking at that very question, hoping that it will come up. YEAH..and it did. I think my new improved method of studying is better ..as in reading then after tat..look through exam questions. I read through every thing even urban but left a bit of population content unread. But still, attempted question on population, wrote quite a lot based on my memory. Deserved a pat on my back- I think I did well as in improvement. Hope I will at least pass.
Econs- hope it will be alright. Yeah gonna study hard…
Econs- hope it will be alright. Yeah gonna study hard… From today onwards, I am going to FIGHT AGRESSIVELY against the flow of life’s failures!!
IT IS MY OWN BATTLE!!
Battle! Bump!!!
I am not going to allow any leakages away, have to tackle any problem instead of just chucking it aside. Not planning to take any risks. Just go all out everytime!
Going to show that eventually, I can make it, not only just make it, but with super good results to make my parents proud of me and even let them be assured that their investment in me is very much worth it.
Show (those who belittle me and betting that I cannot make it)…that I can always do it…prepare to LOSE your bet….hah…
My determination in me is going to be burning brightly again, dun ever want it to die down.
Now’s not the good time for it to die down.
Need to fight right to the end and even further than the end!
“DETERMINATION IS THE KEY TO TAKE US WHERE WE WANT TO BE!!”
