♥A Love Affair

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

I actually thought i wouldn't survive this whole week of exams. Thought i would rather do something else than face the seemingly long week of exams. No breaks in within at all. Worried that my over exhaustion will have an impact on my exams.

During the holidays, i was desperately hoping that time will pass slowly before the school reopens. Also, i have been wondering why is it that many jc students commited suicide. Yeah, probably i kinda understand how it feels just a week ago. Even though they are very smart with so many s-papers, wat i did feel the past week was just a small proportion of how much their stress. But still it is already enough to put me off. I don't think i will ever think of ending my life in such a way, probably just a slight notion about it.

I watched some tv program during the holidays and it featured this guy who had serious insomia. In the end, he didn't sleep for 17 years!!! Wow...haha...poor thing actually. He tried sleeping pills but it didn't work. So he had to do something to create illusion that he is sleeping. hmm, i think lack of sleep for such a long time is so extreme. Hmmm, i would just want one year of having insomia. This year will do. I seriously need a lot of hours to prepare for my A levels.

I have already went through more than half of the papers that i need to do. The worst is considered over--> Geography. Last paper is econs- hmm, quite manageable compared to geography. Yeah, at least survive.
Gp - was alright, at least i manage to finish everything. Having quite a lot of things to write. hope can at least pass.
i realised there are some problems in my essay. oh no...no idea...
Maths- have actually mixed feelings. hope no careless mistakes...hope can passs or even better. forgot how to do some questions even though i did it before in the past. Ahh, i should have persevered on reading through the tutorials. Hate it....
Geography- initially i was quite alright at the start. able to look through the questions and have my own selection as quickly as possible. then i did a time mistake as in i forgot that drq requires 15 mins, i allocated half an hour for 1 drq. then luckily i realised it, if not i won't be able to finish most part of the papers..I am not sure whether I have written enough content for each question. When I was on to the 3rd drq, I started to feel the struggle within my heart. I always have this when I am doing geography paper.

I got this feeling that I won’t be able to make it through and might as well give it up. I kept on going against my feelings and try to break out of it. It certainly took lots of energy to do it. Finally, I started to hasten my speed. My hand is getting really tired. I think I really improved on my geography paper. In the past, whenever I see essay questions, my mind will just go blank and will have trouble writing an acceptable length of answer. Aha, this time I actually kept on writing. The flow of thought just keeps on going except that certain people in the examination hall kept on distracting me. The sudden cough just gave me a fright. The constant walking up and down the aisle is really distracting. Gosh, without all these distractions, I think I would have completed the whole paper faster. I actually left out some stuff to write- haven’t complete the whole paper. Sigh, I know how to do but I dun have time. Sigh. But anyway, I feel good when I was doing the paper. Haha. Hmm, it wasn’t so bad after all. Oh ya, hydrology question was taken from the A-level questions. Yeah, during the holidays while I was reading hydrology notes, I was looking at A level questions at the same time to think of the essay outlines in my mind and I kept on looking at that very question, hoping that it will come up. YEAH..and it did. I think my new improved method of studying is better ..as in reading then after tat..look through exam questions. I read through every thing even urban but left a bit of population content unread. But still, attempted question on population, wrote quite a lot based on my memory. Deserved a pat on my back- I think I did well as in improvement. Hope I will at least pass.

Econs- hope it will be alright. Yeah gonna study hard…

Econs- hope it will be alright. Yeah gonna study hard…
From today onwards, I am going to FIGHT AGRESSIVELY against the flow of life’s failures!!

IT IS MY OWN BATTLE!!

Battle! Bump!!!

I am not going to allow any leakages away, have to tackle any problem instead of just chucking it aside. Not planning to take any risks. Just go all out everytime!

Going to show that eventually, I can make it, not only just make it, but with super good results to make my parents proud of me and even let them be assured that their investment in me is very much worth it.

Show (those who belittle me and betting that I cannot make it)…that I can always do it…prepare to LOSE your bet….hah…

My determination in me is going to be burning brightly again, dun ever want it to die down.

Now’s not the good time for it to die down.

Need to fight right to the end and even further than the end!

“DETERMINATION IS THE KEY TO TAKE US WHERE WE WANT TO BE!!”

writtern @6:10 PM

Friday, March 17, 2006

Soon going to be the end of holidays..eee..dun like it...dun even like this holidays...cos i will know the consequences if i didn't make full use of this time to do wat i ought to do.sigh, no choice, i have been progressing terribly slow.

monday- went for the ntu econs seminar. my whole day was being eaten up by it. wat's worse was that i needed to be in school at 7.30am before going to ntu. -_-, i live so near ntu and yet wanted me to go to yishun and came back to jurong again. Isn't it very big displacement...? waste my money and my time, could have sleep even more. hmm,lectures were very long to me. can u believe it, the first lecturer spend 25 minutes to talk and he had 62 slides to talk about...they should have at least size down the content suited for 25 minutes. In the end, he talked too fast and skipped a lot, and i dun get wat he was trying to say. The first tea break was delicious..haha...like ice cream.nice...accidentally knocked into other people, the place was so crowded. i think it really took us 15 minutes to just walk to a short distance because there are too many people and they are walking too slowly. i think most students are wondering wat school we were from, and the teachers kept on asking us which school were we from? haha, my friend was saying that they are still living in the age of yellow uniform. we walked quite far to have our lunch, not bad loh...just that too dry. got free newsweek and the guy was persuading us not to subscribe times and subscribe newsweek instead. i have trouble telling out wat the rest of the lecturers are saying cos they have very strong accent and hard for me to follow. To me, the best was the korean lecturer. He speaks so good and his voice is loud enough for people to pay attention to. Actually, for one moment, i thought he didnt look like he was opening his mouth to talk. Finally, it was the end of the whole thing, too many people going to the bus stop. Saw quite a number of westwoodians from other schools, dun think they recognise me. We had to balance ourselves while we were on the bus because it was swerving here and there wildly. Must have skill to prevent ourselves from falling. Haha, i have experience in it for 3 years so it is quite ok. Used to the way the driver drives at the area. After that, went to have a walk in jurong point, was expecting to see the 2 ppl. But too bad, didn't see them. I saw that the harry potter vcd is available, yeah, i bought it. finally got to watch it, quite funny but too bad, they didn't really follow the book so closely.

tues- nothing much
just know that got jc student commited suicide last friday...

wed- morning cca
sigh, waste of time for me
keep on learning the same old time all over again
even most of the jc1s know already
dun feel like knowing the new instructor when school reopens
hope it will be alright

thurs- cip at childcare centre
wat a long journey...around 16 mrt stations stops.... -_-
luckily i went to bugis before going to meet the rest...finally went in the library
i think i was very noisy in there..
found some information about geo
so many books about geo in there..maybe have to research in there next time
the security guard kept on looking at me..did i do anything wrong?
waited quite a while for the rest to come at the mrt station.
feel like a stranger in this foreign place..let alone in the childcare centre
kept on insisting to tag along..the experienced one...haha...cos we were asked to split into 2 groups..anyway dun want to be with ...
we went to the p3 and p4 section..so many boys ..very few girls..
mostly those under me quite nice...
the p4 guy was very quiet...he even asked me whether i am coming tomorrow..too bad..if i have time..probably i will...but jc liao..so busy..no time...
then after that i was at this p3 table..haha..some little boys look like my primary school, kindergarden classmates or my bro's primary school classmates..haha...
there was this guy who keep on taking out his pokemon file and looked at it for a while..then put inside his bag...he kept on doing that at certain intervals.... *little show off*...haha..finally, he at least took out something different..a ragnorak magazine...then i talk to him about it..after that..he said he play maple..so i said me too..then the guys at his table and others came and talk about it..
the guy..was asking me..are u going to hack my account?
-____________________-
i got a shock lah..and reply back...i dun even know your account so how can i hack?
i asked him..do i have the face that shows i want to hack your account....?
and he said yes loh..

sigh..my heart broke into a million pieces..
ahaha
no lah..just joking...quite interesting conversation...
^_^

quite used to little boys..is there different treatment of boys and girls? i am always with little boys so i lost touch of how to treat little girls.in fact...not much... hmmm..dun know..
but after this whole cip thing, i feel that maybe i can get a part time job in such places..quite fun to be with kids...^_^ so relaxed when i am with them..it is like forget that i am still having a lot of work to do and studies...

writtern @4:55 PM

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

General tendency of the day

Try to adapt yourself to the new rules of the game that are imposed on you. It is in your own interest to appear infinitely more flexible. Major changes are needed in your attitude if you are to avoid surprises and keep the pace.

comments: yeah probably refering to my studies.i need to work harder...

Your chances of the day

The way things are going will upset you but it will not stop you from having an opinion about this apparently difficult topic. You will come out of it well thanks to luck. It will allow you to solve the problem easily.

comments: i dun recall of anything that is something like that....today

Your feelings of the day

Don’t let things wait. Your indecisiveness in love risks to lead you astray. Pull yourself together quickly or someone else will take your place. If you make your move now the sun will shine on you again.

comments: -_-..i will be gladly let some one take my place...hah..huh? wat love? that's not loh...-_________________________-""....dun know wat word should i used to describe how i am feeling....wary? disgusted? mild disapproval? how can it be....? hah..

Your health today

You will completely lose sight of someone you value unless you try purposefully to find that person. This separation is a bitter frustration to you. Go out and search for him/her, and celebrate when the two of you reunite.

comments: wat does this got to do with health? someone you value??? huh..dun know who is that..i am perfectly fine without the "someone u value".haha

Your morale of the day

You will be in good spirits despite a delicate situation especially since another apparently delicate situation will get solved easily. Someone you know might offer help, which would greatly improve your situation.

comments: i really dun have any ideas..dun think i am in good spririts today cos feeling very dreadful...actually
dun remember anyone offering me help....help on wat?

our daily opportunities

You will have an agreeable surprise. Test your luck as one of your close acquaintances seems to be changing his attitude toward you for the better. You will feel reassured so take the time to talk openly to make things clear. You won’t have another occasion like this for a while, so take advantage of it.

commeents: i really dun know...

writtern @10:48 PM

Friday, March 03, 2006

happy that i will have a new hp soon....yeah....even though it is a free gift..but still..got a new change...been waiting for the arrival of the hp...haha....an agony to wait wait and wait....haha..my patience is running low soon...^_^...excited...
this is just one piece of good news....quite contented bah..i should say..
got 3 options..then i choose the best hp out of the rest...the rest not nice loh to me..my bro really knows wat i will choose...haha...one of my best buddies for life...--> my bro

another piece of goodnews -- no school today on friday..yeah...cos A level graduates did quite well. best was 2 people scoring As for 4 A level subjects and 2 distinctions for 2 special papers...whoohoo..congrats! So happy for the people that i know who got straight As for their resutls...i think most of us got influenced by the happy and joyous atmosphere. This makes me want to work even harder...struggle against the current...just like wat a salmon does...

going to set my goals for the next block test...haha..dun want to mention what grades am i aiming for...i need to put a lot of hard work..kinda makes me feel stress...nowadays..i find that sleeping is a waste of time....if only i am the kind who can live without sleep..then i can do work all the time...

writtern @5:30 PM